Ways That You May Be Putting Academic Pressure On Your Teenager
Most parents want to see their children excel academically, but you should always be cognizant of how you're expressing this sentiment. Your interest in your child's education may actually be detrimental to him or her because of the pressure that it's creating. If you're aware that you're putting educational pressure on your teen, your mission is to back off a little. You may also want to book some sessions for you to see a counselor to help you change this behavior. You may also want to think about separate counseling sessions for your teen. Here are some ways that you might be applying this pressure.
Frequently Discussing College And Career
Many parents hope that their teens will attend college and have fulfilling careers, but your teen already likely knows that this is your wish. If you're bringing up college and careers daily, you'll not only get your teen to stop listening to you, but he or she will also develop a significant amount of pressure about his or her future. The teenage years can be challenging for several reasons, but constantly feeling as though every school assignment can make or break a college application and a career beyond that can be extremely difficult.
Focusing On Shortcomings
A parent who celebrates a teenager's academic successes can help the teen to feel positive about himself or herself, while a parent who highlights a teen's shortcomings can add considerable pressure to him or her. For example, if your teen brings home a paper with a grade of 85 percent, this is typically a reason to celebrate. However, some parents might ask why the paper didn't get a higher mark, rather than noting its good mark. Teens in this situation can feel as though they can never please their parents academically.
Enforcing Extra Work
Some parents are so intent on their children succeeding at school that they have their teens do extra work. For example, if your child is struggling in one subject, you might have him or her practice this subject throughout the summer break. In moderation, this idea may be beneficial, but if you're taking an obsessive approach to it, you're putting significant pressure on your child. It's important to remember that putting so much pressure on your teen can be detrimental. He or she could begin to drink or use drugs, develop an eating disorder, or even self-harm as a response to this pressure. By committing to adult counseling to change your behavior, you'll be helping to alleviate some pressure on your child.